April Fools Site: Going Colonial

Posted April 1, 2012, 10:24 p.m.

On April Fools Day 2012, Off on a Tangent appeared as if it were a colonial-era American news source somehow moved onto the Internet.

Under the name The honorable Scott Bradford, Esq. reports upon the Present State of American Affairs, I posted a couple of articles written as-if it was currently April 1, 1776, and a well-connected American revolutionary pamphleteer was commenting upon current affairs.

I did my best to make sure the articles were historically accurate and referred to events occurring around that time.

Click to see how it looked!

Scott Bradford is a writer and technologist who has been putting his opinions online since 1995. He believes in three inviolable human rights: life, liberty, and property. He is a Catholic Christian who worships the trinitarian God described in the Nicene Creed. Scott is a husband, nerd, pet lover, and AMC/Jeep enthusiast with a B.S. degree in public administration from George Mason University.

Quotes

Happy Cinco de Mayo! The best taco bowls are made in Trump Tower Grill. I love Hispanics!

The West did not get rich because of slavery or imperialism or because of a neocolonialism that supposedly siphons off the riches of Third World countries. It is successful because of its culture, rooted in the Greco-Roman and Judeo-Christian heritage, because of the distinctive institutions that developed over centuries, because of the freedom granted to individuals.

One way to make enemies and antagonize people is to challenge the spirit of the world.

It is justice, not charity, that is wanting in the world.

When a true genius appears in the world, you may know him by this sign, that the dunces are all in confederacy against him.

I’ve lived, Sir, a long time, and the longer I live, the more convincing Proofs I see of this Truth: That God governs in the Affairs of Men.

The passions are not evil but they are stupid. They need a teacher.

It is good to tame the mind, which is difficult to hold in and flighty, rushing wherever it listeth; a tamed mind brings happiness.

You know, it doesn’t really matter what they write as long as you’ve got a young and beautiful piece of ass.

The saddest aspect of life right now is that science gathers knowledge faster than society gathers wisdom.

It makes little sense to condemn Christianity for its adherents’ and leaders’ hypocrisy; our faith is possibly the only one in the world that openly admits it is full of imperfect, sinful hypocrites.

This is the precept by which I have lived: Prepare for the worst; expect the best; and take what comes.

The steam engine, the multiple press, and the public school, that trio of the industrial revolution, have taken the power away from kings and given it to the people.

The West is able to look at its own foibles and laugh, even make fun of its own fundamental principles. There is no Islamic equivalent to Monty Python’s Life of Brian. Can we look forward to seeing The Life of Mo anytime in the future?

There is no such thing as public money; there is only taxpayers’ money.

Consensus is the business of politics. Science, on the contrary, requires only one investigator who happens to be right, which means that he or she has results that are verifiable by reference to the real world.

The life of the nation is secure only while the nation is honest, truthful, and virtuous.

Love one another and you will be happy. It’s as simple and difficult as that.

This a wonderful day. I’ve never seen this one before.

Men must change with the times or die.

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